IM FUCKING SCREAMING
IM IN FUCKING STITCHES
the only thing funnier than this video are the comments on it
Post reblogged from with 383,340 notes
dont u hate it when its nine in the afternoon but ur eyes are just normal sized
I’ve seen this post three times on my dash and i still cant fucking figure out what it means is it like some secret code. are 22,000+ of you in a secret society????? what the fuck is going on?????
some of my favorite tags:
some more gems:
So a boyband walked onto the Britain’s Got Talent stage and everyone thought they were going to sing One Direction or something typical…and then they sung Stars from Les Miserables.
This is the best thing ever. Just listen to those harmonies <3
but what if a vampire drank the blood of someone who was anemic like would they be seriously grossed out
“what the fuck is this”
“i have anemia”
“can you take something for that you should probably take something for that this shit is nasty to drink let alone have running through your body i’m setting up a doctor’s appointment for you”
“dude really you don’t have to just leave what the fu—”
“you disgust me here take these iron supplements”
“where did you even get th—”
“shut up and take your pills and dont forget your vitamin D”
“i’m going to check up on you weekly to make sure you’re taking them”
“that’s not necessary”
“maybe we should work on a dietary plan with foods rich in iron and other things for you”
“do you get this involved with all of your meals”
did u get the cookbook i orderd 4 u
Oh my god, first of all stop using text speak, you told me you were 278, second how did you know where I LIVED, third yes I got it.
heard onions were good 4 blood, eat lots
So you can have a tasty meal? I guess you’d rather I stay away from garlic, huh.
UR being v rude I just got u a present!!!
THE COOKBOOK IS CALLED “HOW TO TASTE DELICIOUS,” I AM CALLING THE COPS
Anonymous asked: I feel like one of theses days the joker is gonna spray Gotham with laugh gas and NOTHING will happen. The citizen of Gotham will have built an immunity from all the chemical shit that gets thrown at them.
I don’t think that’ll happen. Immunity to chemicals/poisons tends to be built up in matters of small exposures (I think, not my field) and the villains would have to be using the same basic chemicals every time, not likely. You’d also have to survive the prior exposures which seems not very Gotham~y. — Besides, it’s a fictional city and that wouldn’t make for a good story precedent to set, the citizens as immune to such a common plot point.
Now what I’d like to see is the people of Gotham building an immunity to widespread media panic about said Joker Gas.
It becomes like a pollen count on the weather. “And today’s expected Joker Toxin index is listed at 15.4, so make sure to put those breakable objects away on high shelves and put the kids to bed early, because this is going to be a bad one.”
And then the next panel shows an average family just matter-of-fact, getting the seatbelts (that they’ve installed by now) and strapping themselves in while green and/or purple clouds start filtering in through the window, so they’re safely secured when they start to have painful hysterical fits.
Every time the Joker breaks out, sporting goods stores have a BOGO sale on mouthguards.
And like certain cities I know of down South where there’s a chemical depot, many citizens actually own gas masks and there’s sirens for leaks.
You wanna help out Bruce? Those gas masks that you and the Robins don to such good effect (until a villain knocks it off mid-fight), have Wayne Enterprises “develop” a cost-effective public version to sell since it’s such a regular issue. How to keep your giant ass company in business and make your night job easier. Hell, given how regularly it comes up, the government would pay for it. They do in real life.
I’d love to see little things about how there’s water filters commonly purchased advertised by being “Gotham-Grade” or how it was tested and proven to filter out chemicals just like was used in the Scarecrow’s last attack. Stuff like that.
Immunity isn’t likely, but companies capitalizing on the commonality of the threat, locals being desensitized to the repeated same threat situations — that’s stuff I’d buy.
I grew up in North Alabama. — We are not going in the safe room yet, that tornado cell isn’t close and it’s gonna be really boring sitting in a closet with the battery operated radio. Just leave the weather coverage running on the TV and come help fix dinner. — You learn to read how much of an immediate issue commonly occurring dangers are and you take reasonable action without flipping out. It’s part of the routine.
"Honey, get back here and finish your dinner. You heard the radio; Killer Croc is two blocks south of here and going the wrong direction. Your food’s getting cold."
This is exactly the kind of Gothamite I would expect.
"Channel 8 says the fight with Freeze is going on in Tribeca and headed towards the West Village, your school is not going to be closed tomorrow. Now go write your report. You’ll wish you had to deal with Batman if you bring home one more D in Mr. Jones class.”
akiwitch and I often have discussions on how much insurance premiums are in cities like Gotham. Is there “Supercriminal Damage” coverage for your car? Are injuries caused while under the effect of Scarecrow’s fear toxins paid for by your medical insurance? Does FEMA do relief work after Mr. Freeze blankets part of Gotham in ice and frost? Or are they treated like “Acts of God” even though there is a clear human cause (because how do you hold one woman responsible when she uproots half the plants in Gotham and attacks people with them)?
Can we get a comic series about this stuff? Nothing fancy… just some shorts about the everyday people living in these cities while heroes and criminals duke it out… personally, I’d read the shit out of that.
I’d appreciate just some one off special issues or a few background scenes. It’d be fun.
do action movies know they can have more than one female character
Someone should make an action movie with all girls except for one guy and have no explanation or mention of it in the movie and then pay all of the actors to act surprised like they’d never noticed when they get the inevitable storm of questions.
A man in the grocery store line today approached me and said, “Sir, when I first saw you I was extremely attracted to you, but then I noticed that you are a boy. How… I mean, why do you dress so provocatively?”
I responded, “Well, in today’s world the majority of the straight male race view women as objects, or something that belongs to them. I dress provocatively because it attracts the attention of men in a sexual and OBJECTIVE way. However, when realized that I am actually male, they often become confused, disgusted, upset or all of the above. By inflicting this minor emotional damaged upon the ego of a man raised by twisted societal gender norms, maybe, just maybe the individual will think twice before viewing another woman with an objective attitude and sense of belonging. No woman, belongs to ANYONE. Male or female, the equality of human beings needs to be a priority. It is something worth dressing up for.”
I AM NOT KIDDING. The woman behind me, the female cashier, the old lady bagging groceries and the woman in front of me who was talking on the phone STOPPED, …. and proceeded to gasp and clap. The man shook my hand, told me to have a blessed day and then said, “excuse me ladies, I need to visit my daughter.”
…. I was shaking by the time I walked out of the store.
- Elliott Alexzander
TW/TVD AU; teen vampire wolf diaries: lydia and allison find themselves checking out two handsome strangers who just so happen to be the town’s favourite vampire brothers.
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